Girl who killed self lamented family’s poverty in diary
I just read this article from a forum and it really broke my heart. Is our people really THAT hopeless? I have to share my thoughts and experience on this one:
I remember some months before I came here in the US, our regular maggugulay came up to our gate asking for help for his 8 year old daughter. Apparently, she was in the hospital and suffering from Dengue fever and his father was asking around our village for money, because her
platelets are so low that she needs to have a transfusion. I didn't
think it was a scam that time, because I saw the father's eyes as he
begged for a little cash. I am also low in cash as I only have 2 one
hundred dollar bills in my wallet. I handed out one 100-peso bill and left
out the other to sit undisturbed in my wallet. He was grateful for the money
and hurriedly walked away.
He ran away quickly and suspicion aroused in my part. What if its a scam? I really don't know the guy but he introduced himself as a vegetable
vendor whom my mom gets her weekly stash of vegetables. I shooed the
thought away and hope for the best for her daughter. It was just a hundred, I thought. But it is enough money for transpo and food for a day. That's ok, I assured myself. If it were true, I helped the poor guy out and my conscience is spared.
Two days later, he was back. He stood in front of our gate with a sad, long face asking once again for money. I thought, WTF? He
told me wasn't able to come up with cash to afford the platelet
transfusion the last time and this time, he needs it to bury
his daughter. My heart sank. Literally, I died, before him. I was standing upright but I can feel myself sprawling on the ground.
A lightning of thoughts flashed across my head: I should have given him the other one
hundred dollar bill. I thought about it a million times and scourged myself as I hear it in my brain. Oh, that poor girl. And her father: the thin, frail man before me, was asking money for her burial. It was the most heartbreaking moment to be in. Honestly, I never felt so helpless before. He told me that it was a great loss. She was a smart girl and could have been their hope. He told that to me with dry eyes, probably strained and dried up from all his weeping. He cannot cry anymore. Now, he has no money to bury his own daughter and all he has is this misery and twisted hope that people will pity his situation. All I could think of is giving him every cent I had in my wallet. I did not let myself to think. I was consumed by my guilt and thought of how to help this poor, poor man.
But, would
it have made a difference? Would another hundred dollar bill save her
daughter's life? It wouldn't be enough for a transfusion anyway and I
don't expect a lot of people in our small subdivision would believe his
story and could not beg enough money to afford it. I tried to blame the government, our corrupt governance and our stupid, imbecile of a health system. I blamed Gloria, Erap, Marcos and all the past presidents who promised us hope for this country. But, it is useless to blame. One life was lost and more will be at stake as we go through the "dengue season" year after year.
How can we bring hope for our people?
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